Monday, May 16, 2011 @ Monday, May 16, 2011
so i havent been in here for a long while.. but heads up, got in OCS. and its another eight more months of training. really hope it doesnt get too tough, although im very it will.
having a long book out this weekend, due to my wing having an amazing schedule planner who puts all the in lieu holidays on either mondays or fridays. as a result, we get really long weekends, which is a huge huge encouragement really.. since the week's already so mundane, looking forward to long weekends is a surprisingly huge motivation factor.
somehow every bookout seems a to sting a little. im not sure why, but i have a feeling its because i know i have to book in again. i love bookouts, but i hate the feeling of booking back in.. but that's the live im going to have to lead from now on.. i miss school. really really miss school. guess that's the general consensus right now, how every one's missing school so so much.
i guess what makes army tough for me is that you have no time. or rather, really little time.. like, all you ever do is read about people's lives, on either facebook or their blogs. at its very best, a text. and when you bookout, you have to manage your time so well it gets tiring! the need to maximise the time you have out here takes so much priority.. but at times, you dont stretch the time to the fullest. and that's where it might hurt a little. because you feel as if you wasted some of your free time on nothing! now i know how precious time out here is. damn precious!
and apart from that, a lot of thoughts run all over the place. fly, swim, drown. but im so thankful for people who genuinely make me happy. happy, a word so often overlooked and left out. english teachers tell us never to use this in your writings because its too vague. yet that vagueness conveys an extraordinary depth. one word, encompassing so much that it loses its credibility to describe one of the most sought after emotions of this day and age. in fact, as age creeps up on you, and you see more and more of this world. you get bombarded with things, mostly problems and annoyances, happiness doesnt seem so real anymore. i mean, who am i to say this, im barely nineteen.
but you take a look at a child, his smile, his radiant jovial disposition. and you know he is genuinely absorbed, contented with the way things are. the smile, with no shadows, whatsoever, of the scars left behind by broken hearts, torn dreams, stress levels. just enjoying, completely mesmerised by his cone of ben and jerry's strawberry cheesecake. that simple ignorant bliss, simple as it seems, yet as incomprehensible as it is. no wonder so many people say they dont want to grow up. i am one of them. unwilling to give up the happy innocence of schooling life, of being a kid.
but i guess that's just ranting. life goes on, im turning nineteen in slightly less than two weeks. so i'd better brace myself for more to come. its ironic how some kids say they wished they grew up faster. who ever said growing up was easy?
Monday, May 16, 2011 @ Monday, May 16, 2011
so i havent been in here for a long while.. but heads up, got in OCS. and its another eight more months of training. really hope it doesnt get too tough, although im very it will.
having a long book out this weekend, due to my wing having an amazing schedule planner who puts all the in lieu holidays on either mondays or fridays. as a result, we get really long weekends, which is a huge huge encouragement really.. since the week's already so mundane, looking forward to long weekends is a surprisingly huge motivation factor.
somehow every bookout seems a to sting a little. im not sure why, but i have a feeling its because i know i have to book in again. i love bookouts, but i hate the feeling of booking back in.. but that's the live im going to have to lead from now on.. i miss school. really really miss school. guess that's the general consensus right now, how every one's missing school so so much.
i guess what makes army tough for me is that you have no time. or rather, really little time.. like, all you ever do is read about people's lives, on either facebook or their blogs. at its very best, a text. and when you bookout, you have to manage your time so well it gets tiring! the need to maximise the time you have out here takes so much priority.. but at times, you dont stretch the time to the fullest. and that's where it might hurt a little. because you feel as if you wasted some of your free time on nothing! now i know how precious time out here is. damn precious!
and apart from that, a lot of thoughts run all over the place. fly, swim, drown. but im so thankful for people who genuinely make me happy. happy, a word so often overlooked and left out. english teachers tell us never to use this in your writings because its too vague. yet that vagueness conveys an extraordinary depth. one word, encompassing so much that it loses its credibility to describe one of the most sought after emotions of this day and age. in fact, as age creeps up on you, and you see more and more of this world. you get bombarded with things, mostly problems and annoyances, happiness doesnt seem so real anymore. i mean, who am i to say this, im barely nineteen.
but you take a look at a child, his smile, his radiant jovial disposition. and you know he is genuinely absorbed, contented with the way things are. the smile, with no shadows, whatsoever, of the scars left behind by broken hearts, torn dreams, stress levels. just enjoying, completely mesmerised by his cone of ben and jerry's strawberry cheesecake. that simple ignorant bliss, simple as it seems, yet as incomprehensible as it is. no wonder so many people say they dont want to grow up. i am one of them. unwilling to give up the happy innocence of schooling life, of being a kid.
but i guess that's just ranting. life goes on, im turning nineteen in slightly less than two weeks. so i'd better brace myself for more to come. its ironic how some kids say they wished they grew up faster. who ever said growing up was easy?